In 6 days I make what I hope will be my first and only attempt at the
State of Michigan Bar Exam. On my bed lies a 3 1/2 inch binder that is
filled to the brim of what I "should" know. What i actually know for
certain may be a fraction of that.
I have done 1200mbe's up to this point and written maybe 45-50 essays.
I have tried to outline and take notes on all testable topics, I have
been a wife, mother, student, daughter, sister,
friend...throughout....although I dropped off in communications
drastically with everybody. Even my Ma.
The plane tickets are booked, I just e-checked in, the bags are in the
process of being packed, and I have a knot in my stomach the size of
Texas.
I feel sick! I feel no where near ready. I have gotton assurances from
all those who have been here before BUT they all actually could study
in the conventional way. I have stolen 30 mins here, an hour there,
and more than a couple days. I don't think it's enough. My self
perception of my mental abilities is shot. I feel it's not enough.
I've been pulling between 11- 14 Hr days and I still don't feel like I
know this shit.
For once in a long while I can effectively say I am terrified of this
exam and it's making me physically Ill.
The plan... Hit it hard the next six days for on the seventh
day..it...is...done. Come good or come bad. In seven the first (and
hopefully only) attempt will be complete.
Till then..
Take care of you!!
